Grounding Myself

February 2015            

But – there is always a but – despite having a dream job it has its stresses and demands and during the past few years this has got to me. Trouble sleeping, panic attacks, feeling tired all the time. All of this takes its toll. The depression that dogged me in my teens is creeping back. I am feeling fearful and constantly apprehensive, unable to relax.

So, I have decided to do something, to get out more. Going to work early and arriving back late insulates from the outdoors. I tried running a few years back but something about it didn’t feel right, my body didn’t seem

I have, over the past few years helped Dad on his allotment and   found it really enjoyable.

The reasons?  To get out in the fresh air, do something together , to learn from him, to have something in common to share.

I  remember saying to a friend one time in my mid-thirties I wanted to grow things and he laughed and looked at me in disbelief “Plenty of time for that when you are retired”

But something in me when I am digging, sowing, planting and watering, feels right, as natural as breathing. So, last year I put my name down for an allotment and am waiting to hear…shouldn’t be long now, I know I am near the top of the waiting list. In the meantime helping Dad is great, I’m learning a lot and this will be put to good use.


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